~IT's My L!Fe~

This morning, while taking care of some important business in the bathroom, I noticed a spider desperately trying to climb the wall. It would make some progress, slip a little, try again, slip again. It looked like a terrible climber. A few hours later, my wife was venting about office bureaucracy. You know the kind. The places where people in positions of power seem more interested in protecting their territory than helping others succeed. The kind of environment where someone’s growth is viewed as a threat rather than an achievement. And suddenly I thought about that spider. Maybe the spider wasn’t a bad climber. Maybe it was just climbing the wrong damn wall. Think about it. A bathroom is literally a room full of people shitting. The walls are smooth. The environment is hostile. Nobody walks into a bathroom hoping to admire the architectural brilliance of a spider web. Even if the spider somehow succeeded, nobody would celebrate it. Now put that same spider in a fore...

 एक तस्वीर देखी आज, मासूम सी सूरत, उलझी हुई ज़ुल्फ़ें, धूप और हवा आँख-मिचौली खेलती रहीं, और वक़्त थोड़ी देर को ठहर गया। सब कुछ वही था, कुछ भी बदला नहीं था, वही मासूमियत, वही नज़ाकत, वही सुकून, वही ख़ामोशी। फिर भी कुछ तो अलग था, कुछ तो बदल गया था। एक आवाज़ आई, घड़ी की सुइयाँ फिर चल पड़ीं, और मैं उस लम्हे से लौट आया। मैं मुस्कुराया, मुद्दतों बाद कुछ लिख पाया, वो तस्वीर जो आज सामने आई थी, जज़्बातों की एक लहर साथ लाई थी, दिल के किसी कोने से चुपचाप पुराने वक़्त की यादें उठा लाई थी।

एक वक्त था, खेला करते थे शब्दों से हम कभी... अच्छा बुरा जो भी सही, पीरों दिया करते थे हम यूँही। एक मुद्दत हूयी महसूस किए उन छुपे जज़्बातों को..  यूँही उड़ते किसी पन्ने ने मानो खोल दिया हो यादों को। वक्त ने कुछ ऐसा घुमाया है , दिल ने भी खुद्को कहीं छुपाया है.. शब्दों से वो जो रिश्ता है , खोए हुए महबूब जैसा है। ज़िंदगी अब एक चक्कर है , बाक़ी सब पीछे छूटा एक मंजर है.. एक याद से शुरू हुआ ये एक ख़याल है, शब्दों से पिरोया एक मायाजाल है।  (Ek waqt tha, khela karte the shabdon se hum kabhi.. Acha bura jo bhi sahi, piroh diya karte the hum yunhi... Ek muddat huyi mehsoos kiye un chupe jazbaaton ko.. Yunhi udte kisi panne ne maano khol diya ho yaadon ko..  Waqt ne kuch aisa ghumaya hai, dil ne bhi khudko kahin chupaya hai... Shabdon se wo jo rishta hai, khoye huye Mehboob jaisa hai... Zindagi ab ek chakkar hai, baki sab piche chutha ek manzar hai.. Ek yaad se shuru hua yeh ek khayal hai, Shabdon se piroya ek mayajaal hai... )

Weird title, right? How can Happiness be a pain… I am writing something after a long long time, there was a time back in college days to years immediately after that when there was so much to write, there was so much to talk, there was so much to feel. Then we got busy with our jobs and then marriage and a Settled life… Marrying your best friend and your life has its perk that somehow you attain Nirvana – A different sort of Nirvana perhaps. One where life is too comfortable, you are never alone, and you have a basic lack of any pain in your life… Now even Nirvana has a problem, the lack of pain gives you a writer’s block… Not just that. When collectively everyone around you and all your close friends attain this stage, you reach a point when you start missing your friends. Not that they have gone anywhere but the things you used to talk changes, the emotions and feelings you used to share changes and things like jobs, etc. take center stage. ...

I am no blind follower aka Bhakt as some pseudo intellects call them but i don't mind if they call me one! Trend chal gya hai bus gaali dene ka, pehle sarkar kuch karti nhin thi to gaali ab kuch kar rahi hai to gaali.. Bus khud kuch na karna pade aur desh badal jaye yeh sapne dekhne wale log hain yahan pe apni jeb se kuch nikal to jaye, aansun aa jata hai. Yeh nhin dekhenge ki saalon ka galat sahi karne mein waqt khoon paseena sab lagta hai.. Petrol ke baad chappal/Joote ke rate bhi bada do nange paon chalna pade but 100% support the govt in what they are doing! I have always said that if politicians can deliver only and only 10% of what they commit i would be happy with it coz that would be more than negatives they have been doing and here we have a govt. that's fixing the foundation of this nation be it toilets or tax reforms, cooking gas or 100% electrification.  They are hitting the enemy hard on border and tax thief's inside equally harder. they are correcting ...

Sitting in my balcony on a bean bag with  purple and green chinese string lights covering the entire balcony like a roof over my head and while humming the song 🎶Mere Mehboob Qayamat hogi aaj ruswa tere darr se inayat hogi 🎶 i browse through my Facebook timeline and this ad from Urban Ladder showing different collection of furniture 🛋️ that in itself gives a particular look and feel to your home made me think about this chase. The Chase we all are a part of, that wants us to keep running to earn more money💰. The Chase to acquire all this stuff that we think will bring more comfort to our lives. And even though you can afford it you think about another chase, the Chase to have a house 🏠 of our own where we'll keep all these modern designer stuff and will chill, enjoy and have a great life after office hours. The truth is even if you fullfill one chase another one sucks you in. You have a house of your own and slowly you...

आज एक मुद्दत के बाद खुद के साथ बैठे हैं...  सुकून के कुछ पलों को पकडे बैठे हैं..  तनहा भले ही हैं पर तन्हाई का नामोनिशां नहीं...  कुछ यूँ माहौल बना कर बैठे हैं..  सितारों सी चमकती यह रौशनी, रूहः को छूती ये धुन...  लबों पे अंगूर का प्याला और दिल में ख्याल तुम्हारा...  आज एक मुद्दत के बाद खुद के साथ बैठे हैं...  Aaj ek muddat ke baad khud ke saath baithe hain... Sukoon ke kuch palon ko pakde baithe hain.. Tanha bhale hi hain par tanhayi ka naamonishan nhin.. Kuch yuh mahaul bna kar baithe hain.. Sitaron si chamkati yeh roshni, ruhh ko chooti huyi yeh dhun... Laboon pe angooron ka payala aur dil mein khayal tumhara...  Aaj ek muddat ke baad khud ke saath baithe hain..

एक दर्द बस यूँही सीने से लगाए बैठे हैं..  एक तस्वीर यूँही सजाए बैठे हैं...  हैं करीब वो और ज़िन्दगी हसीं बहुत.. फिर भी नजाने क्यों यह ख्याल लिए बैठे हैं...  चंद अल्फाज़ निकले इस जुबां से..  बस इसलिए दर्द का दामन पकडे बैठे हैं...  एक दर्द बस यूँही सीने से लगाए बैठे हैं...  Ek dard bus yunhi seene se lagaye baithe hain.. Ek tasveer yunhi sajaye baithe hain... Hain kareeb wo aur zindagi haseen bahut... Fir bhi na jane kyun yeh khayal liye baithe hain..  Chund alfaaz nikle is jubaan se..  Bus isliye dard ka daaman pakde baithe hain... Ek dard bus yunhi seene se lagaye baithe hain...

ज़िन्दगी कितनी ही खुशहाल क्यों ना हो.. मज़्ज़ा तो दर्द ही देता है...  दिन गुज़रते हैं ख़ुशी से..  रातें नशीली तो दर्द से ही होती हैं...  हसने से लगती है ज़िन्दगी हलकी.. जज़्बातों का वजन तो दर्द ही एहसास कराता है...  बातें ख़ुशी ख़ुशी हवाओं में उड़ती हैं..  लिखने को शब्द तो दर्द ही दे पाता है...  ज़िन्दगी कितनी ही खुशहाल क्यों ना हो.. मज़्ज़ा तो दर्द ही देता है...  Zindagi kitni hi khushal kyun na ho.. Mazza to dard hi deta hai... Din guzarte hain khushi se.. Raaten nasheeli to dard se hi hoti hain... Husne se lagti hai zindagi halki.. Jazbaaton ka wajan to dard hi ehsaas krata hai... Baaten khushi khushi hawaon mein udti hai.. Likhne ko shabd to dard hi de pata hai...  Zindagi kitni hi khushal kyun na ho.. Mazza to dard hi deta hai...

वक़्त, नाजाने कितने ही जाने अंजाने सवालों के जवाब छुपाये बैठे हो तुम... कुछ सवाल तो हम भी भूले बैठे थे, नाजाने क्यों वो सवाल याद दिला जाते हो तुम। मुस्कुराते हुए बैठे थे हम, नाजाने कहाँ से आँखों के किनारे वो एक आंसू ले आते हो तुम... वक़्त, नजाने कितने ही सवालों के जवाब छुपाये बैठे हो तुम।।। Waqt, najane kitne hi jane anjane sawalon ke jawab chupaye baithe ho tum... Kuch sawal to hum bhi bhule baithe the, najane kyun wo sawal yaad dila jate ho tum... Muskurata huye baithe the hum na jane khan se aankhon ke kinare wo ek aansu le aate ho tum.. Waqt, najane kitne hi sawalon ke jawab chupaye baithe ho tum!!!

Ek chingari jali hai dil mein... Dekhna hai anjaam-e-safar kya hoga.. Hogi tabdeel yeh aatish-e-ishq mein, ya sirf dhuaan hoga!!! एक चिंगारी जली है दिल में... देखना है अंजाम-ऐ-सफर क्या होगा .. होगी तब्दील ये आतिश-ऐ-इश्क़ में, या सिर्फ धुंआ होगा !!!  ~Gera

Badlapur: Even though its too late to give the review of this movie but still here it goes, for a change i took my brain to the movie as well and so that's why for a change a detailed review. Thanks to power cut, got to see Badlapur, Even though every single actor has given a brilliant performance i kept waiting for some serious turn of events in the movie, was often asking the question - Kya to, kyun to :P Though Varun Dhawan's looks are perfect for a revenge i found the entire revenge to be just for the sake of taking revenge, they was no angle to it, he was just doing random shit. It felt like the dude wanted to just chillax with a beer but instead someone forced him to drink whiskey and take revenge. Those who have seen shows like Dexter & Breaking bad will relate to two scene in the movie: 1. The plastic sheet across the room and killing. 2. The drum full of money, even though Vinay pathak has been shown collecting 2.5 crores in different bags from different pl...

A few lines i wrote a long time back on a piece of paper which keeps coming back to my mind and i thought before i forget it i should digitalise it.. Probably that what Jagjit singh meant when he said "Mera geet amar kar do" :P बस युंही बैठे रहो साथ और उम्र बीत जाये.. ना तुम कुछ कहो, ना हम और फिर भी दिल की बात हो जाये... दो चार पल सुकून के जीलो, थोड़ा हस लो, थोड़ा मुस्कुरा लो. घड़ियाँ यह इत्मीनान की फिर हो ना हों, लम्हा यह तन्हा फिर हो ना हों.. बस युंही बैठे रहो साथ और उम्र बीत जाये...

The winds kept flowing and the yacht kept sailing... Sailing in the uncharted waters, With no direction and no destination... The view was amazing and the music of freedom refreshing... you fell in love with the wind and forgot your way.. The path that was destined for you, That you shall have to take.. Coz that's a commitment you have made, even though that's not what your heart says... The wind stopped and so did the yacht... you came back to senses and got off before its too late.. the wind and water is what you still crave... But you stop your breath and settle for the fate..  Give up on the love for winds and water and tell the world that's what you hate... No am not blaming you.. How can I... you were the victim here... A victim of clueless wind, A victim of carefree water... A victim of beautiful view, A victim of sweet music... The winds will flow again and so will the yacht.. You won't sail on it and will look when it will pass.. There wil...

Somewhere in the middle of too good to be true and You just don't care enough I got lost... Somewhere between the good guy and a jerk I got lost.. Somewhere between giving happines and bringing tears out I got lost.. Somewhere between plessure and sickness I got lost.. Somewhere between intentions and action I got lost.. Somewhere between Love and Life I got lost... But being lost is just a matter of perspective, sometimes you discover that being that rude, no caring guy is probably the best way and what we think and what we do doesn't matter its the reaction that makes the whole difference.

शिकायत ये नहीं कि तुम चले गए... शिकायत तो ये है कि जाते जाते अलविदा भी न कह गए। माना हम इस काबिल नहीं के तुम्हें पा सकते... पर क्या इस लायक भी नहीं के तेरे जाने का तुमसे जान पाते। सफ़र है येह जिंदगी का जानते हैं... अकेले चले थे अकेले जाना होगा। मंजिल तो मौत है और रास्ते अनेक... पर हर राह पे कोई हमसफ़र होगा.. इस मोड़ पे तुम तो अगले पे कोई और होगा। गम यह नहीं के छुट गया साथ... गम यह है की तेरा अलविदा सुन पायें हमे तो इस लायक भी न समझा।

This is not a blog post but saving the Goodbye Email that i sent to some people in my company. The 4+ year long journey with HCL that started with HCL’s Japanese Business Program has now come to this email with the subject Sayonara! After all it started with Japanese, ending it with Japanese completes the circle. I came here as a fresher with a blank mind, just with a lot of dreams! HCL journey has been truly wonderful, Right from the first project  Comv...  where a fresher was given system engineer and was asked to design solutions, that very moment I thought it’s a cool company. The work there and the learning gave my career the foundation it needed. Aci....  Project was the turning point, a different kind of project that changed how things worked in IT. I am sure many of us miss this project and always wish for another such project to come our way. Sym.....  project although a completely different profile added to my learning in a completely diffe...