disclaimer:-both of these blogs are in any sense not a personal comment to anyone its just represents my personal feelings....
Have you lost your identity?
Read on to know if you have started to alter yourself and your lifestyle just to suit your partner
Being in love is a fantastic feeling. However, there are those who remain loving and are able to maintain their identity and there is another set of people who go slightly off balance when they get into a relationship. Do you ever notice that small things about you and your lifestyle have changed ever since you got involved with your current partner? The following are a few signs you need to look out for that would indicate you are allowing a little too much control by your partner on yourself, which could or could not be your partner's doing. Even you might not realise your change in behaviour until it's too late. If the following applies to you, it is time to reconsider your priorities:
ALWAYS CALLING! Your partner has all your phone numbers and is calling you at least five to six times a day. He or she knows what time to call you at work, when you're out or even when you are at home. While most individuals would know this is a sign of over obsessive behaviour, you may think otherwise because at the moment you are so in love. But understand that when you encourage such behaviour it does not get better it only gets worse, because in many ways you are feeding your partner's insecurities.
CHANGE IN PERSONALITY If your friends have begun to notice a change in your character or personality and not necessarily a good change, listen to them. Hopefully you have friends who look out for you and if they express concern over how much you have changed as a person, figure out if any of these changes can be attributed to your current partner. If yes, put a stop to it immediately and pull yourself together. It is important to be who you are. Remember change is a good thing only if it is in the form of growth.
Do you feel that all the people you were closest to have started to associate with you a lot less? If this is the case it means on some level you have given priority to your partner over your friends. No one is asking you to ignore the love in your life, but if you are spending so much time with your partner that you start to lose friends, you are heading in a very wrong direction. Friends are an important part of your life so give them the time and space that they deserve. Besides, if ever you break-up with your partner, it will be your friends who stick by you.
THE LOVE LINGO The â€˜koochie koo' factor is an unavoidable tragedy that most lovers indulge in. However, don't forget that you are an adult and to get all mush in the bedroom or your private space is all good. If you find yourself using the candy floss lingo in every walk of life, it is a sure sign that you are letting your personal life flow into your professional life. Keep the terms of endearment between you and your partner; behaving like a love sick puppy all the time will do you more harm than good.
CHANGING TASTES Many people often make the mistake of trying to force themselves to like or dislike something, just to comply with what their partners appreciate in life. If you are deliberately changing what you like just to make him or her happy it means you are trying too hard. At the end of the day you will eventually want to return to your own likes and dislikes so stop trying to force it and just stick to doing the things you want to do.
FOLLOWING RULES This is a classic example of how a person can totally lose control of him or herself when in a relationship. If your partner is implementing rules of conduct and behaviour for you and you start to follow those rules, you are definitely on a downward spiral. You need to live life by your own rules and can't be enslaved to another person. Respect yourself and who you are. Being in a relationship or committed to someone does not mean you lose your own identity. So learn to be your own person instead of turning into somebody else's shadow.
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